


Vigilante

by Moonshine_Givens



Series: You may say I'm a dreamer [1]
Category: Justified
Genre: Boyd is Batman, Crack, Gen, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-05
Updated: 2013-01-05
Packaged: 2017-11-23 17:42:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/624843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moonshine_Givens/pseuds/Moonshine_Givens
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Art: "Maybe he's become some vigilante."<br/>Raylan: "Hmmm, maybe he's Batman."</p><p>Origin of Vigilante - the Latin word vigilans.<br/>Vigília: Deprivation (voluntary or involuntary) of sleep during the night; the state of those who are kept awake during the night time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Vigilante

**Author's Note:**

  * For [shadowolfhunter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadowolfhunter/gifts).



> Hey there, Gunslingers! I'm running a 39 degree Celsius fever right now! It's not fun! I have no fucking idea where did this came from, only I obsess often with this quote. I'm not an English speaker, yadda yadda, hope you like it!

It was the end of the day in the office, and Raylan was feeling tired and anxious to get home. But if the look of pure terror on Art’s face while talking on the phone was anything to go by, Raylan was sure he wouldn’t be meeting his bed anytime soon.

Art stepped out of his glass doors, looked around and found Raylan’s eyes. He made a small motion to indicate he wanted Raylan to follow him, but didn’t lead him back to his office. Instead, Art went to the lifts, looking more nervous than Raylan has ever seen.

“What the hell happened?”

“No time to explain, Raylan. There’s a storm coming to Harlan. A threat as we have never faced before.”

Raylan was left wondering why the hell was Art talking like that, and why he had time to speak in riddles but not to explain the damn situation. He was so surprised he didn’t realize Art was taking him to the rooftop, until they climbed some stairs and were out in the night air.

There was a big searchlight standing not two feet away that Raylan couldn’t remember ever being there. Art walked towards it, his big coat (Art in a big coat? …what?) floating around him.

“You’ll need to help Boyd, Raylan. You’ll need to be the face Harlan will trust.”

Again… what?

“What? Why?”

“Because he’s the hero Harlan deserves, but not the one it needs right now.”

Art turned the light on. Crossing the night air was a huge figure of a black bat, imprinting on a dark cloud above their heads. Raylan was left staring at the cloud, and... What. The. Fuck.

*****

Raylan was driving the road to Harlan County, without any recollection of getting inside the car or deciding to be a part of this madness. He drove pass US army barricades all along the road, where strongly armed men yelled at each other without any apparent reason, but didn’t make any movement to try and stop him.

He blinked and was standing side by side with Boyd along the first houses of Harlan, the army facing them on the other side. He watched as many families seemed to pack their stuff in hurry, the kids crying and the women screaming. And then he realized what was wrong with the scene: it took him awhile, but he finally noticed that Boyd was wearing a bat suit, full with a bat mask, bat ears and, get this, a bat cape.

“Boyd, what is the point…”

“Raylan, this city needs you. You can’t fail the city.”

“What is wrong with you voice, are you sick or somethin’…”

“Limehouse is going to burn and destroy the whole county if I don’t stop him.”

“Limehouse? What has Limehouse got to do with anything? And how the hell is he gonna burn it, Boyd?”

Boyd turns, his ridiculous cape flying all around him. “I have no name. A hero can be anyone.” He then looks ahead in the distance, and man, really, dramatic much? “Limehouse has a bomb with a remote detonator.”

“Boyd, what kind of bomb can destroy the whole county, what the fuck are you even talkin’ about.”

“Do you wish to know what he whispered to me, as I was rotting in hell?” Boyd was suddenly all over his personal space, and Raylan feared, for a whole second, that he was going to get stabbed in the eye with the bat ears out of the damn bat mask. “He said that he would destroy Harlan and then, when Harlan is in ashes, only then I have his permission to die!”

Okay, so there was something in the water. That sounded like the only explanation possible, yeah. Suddenly, they hear the sound of a motorcycle coming from Harlan, and a weird ass motorcycle at that, really low in a way that Raylan kept wondering couldn’t be good for your posture. Ava was driving it; only, there was something different about her.

Oh, yeah. Sure. She was wearing a cat suit. All black skin-tight leather, a black mask – and what the hell was that about, if they wanted to be all secrecy and subtleness maybe they shouldn’t be wearing black suits with animal themes or a fucking black cape – and, thank god, no tail. But there were small cat ears.

She gets off the motorcycle and damn, those are really fucking high heels, she’s almost taller than Raylan. How the hell does she think she’ll outrun a bomb in those?

“Look, Batman, I’m not gonna stay here and watch you get yourself killed over your own heroic stupidity!” …wait, is she talking to Boyd? “Limehouse already won.”

“Limehouse was molded by darkness. He won’t stop until the whole world is burning.”

Raylan wants to ask why, why would anyone want to burn a shitty town like Harlan, what was the profit on it, really, you would end up losing money and energy and in the end you would have hillbilly ashes and seriously, what for?

CatAva was, apparently, torn between taking none of Boyd’s shit or being incredibly attract to him since, to say the next words, she apparently had to be standing really close to him with her hands up in his chest:

“I blow that tunnel open, I’m gone.”

What tunnel?

“There’s more to you than that.”

“Come with me. Save yourself. You don't owe these people any more. You've given them everything.”

Raylan would very much like to know what the hell the known criminal Boyd Crowder had given to the fine population of Harlan County, Kentucky.

“Not everything. Not yet.” And then they were kissing, great. The wind was blowing as well, so the stupid cape was flying all around. The kissing thing didn’t seem to be stopping any time soon, either.

“Hey!” Raylan yelled, so fucking tired. “What the hell am I doing here, anyway?”

“You have to take the children, Raylan.” Boyd finally disentangled himself from Ava, and how did they manage to kiss with masks? “The children, Raylan, they need you.” The voice was really getting into his nerves, but okay, the children. “I’ll deal with Limehouse and the bomb.”

With a movement of the cape, Boyd was gone, and Ava left in the bad-for-your-back motorcycle. Raylan was taken with urgency, with the feeling of the mission: he had to save the kids, he had to drive them out of town, Batman was counting on him, the children…

Oh damn. He was Robin.

*****

He woke up in his own bed, still feeling the pain of the terrible day – week – but not remembering much about the damn criminals he had chased the whole fucking week non-stop. The only thing he could think of is that he was Robin. He was the stupid cop with a hero complex that kept stalking the real hero around, wishing he was as big and manly and hot as Batman was. He was the side-kick with a boy-crush.

Just like in the dream, he was dressed (or, at least, wearing a pair of jeans) and in his car on the road to Harlan before he knew it.

Now, anyone with a Google Maps can tell you it’s about a three hour ride from Lexington to Harlan any day. Raylan didn’t knew if he was driving way faster or if time doesn’t make much sense when you’re driving at 2 am, the point being, he felt like he was in the car something like five minutes before he was parking on Boyd’s front door.

He was already calling out when he got out of the car.

“Boyd! Boyd, where are you?” he ran the steps up to the door, and Ava greeted him there, her faithful shotgun by her side.

“Raylan…” she lowered the shotgun and opened the door, seeing something on Raylan’s face that got her worried. “Raylan, what the hell happened?”

“I’m not Robin.” was his only answer.

“Okay, sweetheart, just wait a moment, I’ll get Boyd.”

She hurried inside the house, and in three seconds flat Boyd was at the door. Thankfully, he wasn’t wearing his bat suit, only some boxers and a wife beater, and his hair looked even more spiked than ever. He also looked like he was sleeping only thirty seconds ago, and that makes zero sense to Raylan right now. Batman doesn’t sleep.

… only, Boyd’s not Batman, and that’s the whole point. Right?

Right?

“Look, you’re not Batman.”

“No, Raylan, I’m not.” Boyd answered, very slowly, and his voice was back to normal, thank God.

“You’re not fucking Batman, you hear me?”

“Look, Raylan, why don’t we discuss this inside? The night air won’t do you good.”

Raylan didn’t want to come inside, but then Boyd’s hands were on him, and he realized he wasn’t wearing any shirt, and he was feeling cold. He started trembling.

“I’m… You can’t be Batman, okay, and Ava can’t be Catwoman.”

They were up the stairs and in Ava and Boyd’s room, Boyd’s hand navigating him towards the bed. Raylan didn’t want to sit down, but he also didn’t feel like his legs could hold him any further.

“Ava, honey, could you makes us some herbal tea? Chamomile, maybe?”

Raylan didn’t hear the answer, but Boyd was kneeling in front of him and taking his pants of. Uhm. That was not… that’ not something they do, right? Unless all the rumors are true and Robin does it, and now Boyd expects him to do it because Robin does it.

“I’m not Robin, Boyd.”

Boyd stops, looks Raylan straight in the eye and seems to ponder about the subject in a very serious fashion. “No, Raylan, you surely are not Robin.”

“I’m serious.”

“So am I.” his pants are off, and Boyd’s pushing him up the bed to make him lay on the pillows. “You’re clearly not Robin, and I can assure you, I’m not Batman, nor Ava is or will ever be Catwoman. You have my word for it.”

“Okay” Raylan agreed, breathing more freely now, as if those were the words he needed to hear. He closed his eyes, feeling tired and like all life was being drained from him.

A few minutes later, he felt Boyd lift his shoulders and neck and press a cup between his lips. The sugary taste of warm tea was then filling his mouth, and he didn’t want to drink it, but all fight was now out of his body, and he could only lay there and swallow it. He opened his eyes and met the worried look all over Ava’s face, her hair glowing in the morning sun.

“But it’s 2 am…”

“It was 2 am when you left home, Raylan.” Boyd argued from behind him, still holding him by the shoulders and using a slow, calming voice. “It’s now almost 6, my friend.”

“I should get up and go to work.” He made no movement to do it.

“Raylan.” Boyd moved and was in his line of sight, lowering him on the pillows again. “How long you went without sleeping a full night this past week?”

“Three… maybe four days.” Raylan felt his eyes closing again.

“You can call your boss later. I’ll be right there if you need me, awake and keeping an eye out if you need me, Raylan. We’ll wake you for lunch, alright?”

He wanted to argue, just so Boyd would stop being so bossy over him, but he was already sleeping. Besides, no one can win an argument with the Dark Knight.

**Author's Note:**

> oh, this is shitty, but it's the best I have to offer right now. I wish it were WAY more crack than it is. I'm actually contemplating making a series out of it, and it'll be probably all shitty fics. You wanna scream at me, I'm at ohthati.tumblr.com . Hope you didn't hate it!


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